Blood pressure: Up. Suicide risk assessment: Up.
New group members see me down, so they are even more afraid that the program won't work for them.
New group members see me down, so they are even more afraid that the program won't work for them.
Well, I guess I've always been known for heading the wrong way. Just like my Chicago Cubs.
Life imitates art. Scary when your favorite film is "Trainspotting". Choose Life? Why would I want to do a thing like that.
I am really in the mood to find my old cell phone that my dad took out to put one of those sun lights by my bed. If this PHP doesn't work, I might need the numbers to Carrie Clifton's old dope dealers.
To make matters worse, PHP might end tomorrow. Fuckin' Blue Cross Blue Shield. It's not like I haven't heard time and time again, "you should have kept working at Caterpillar."
Today was about relationships. I have some strong ones. I have some weaker ones. More importantly, I have confusing ones.
And of course frustrating ones like my little sister and Mom who'd like to force feed me a solution to my depression. These aren't bad relationships, but they can't help me right now. I may need to step back from these for a bit.
Did I follow through with that lesson?
"Hi Russ. I gotta pick up your sister from work. We're going to dinner after that. Do you wanna come?"I have to be stronger. Lord knows I should be able to resist a free meal.
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